Danial Jaafar 🇲🇾

Moi: Waa, lagu Ir Radzi "Maafkan Aku" ni boleh nyanyi kat bini bila dia merajuk, marah-marah! Member: Ko dah kahwin ke? Moi: Aku nak tengok rumah ni bro. Tapi, mana eh tempat yang tengah naik tapi tak jauh dari bando? Agak-agak area rumah ko okay? Nanti boleh la anak-anak kita buat sleepover. Member: Sebelum anak-anak aku dan anak-anak ko buat sleepover, ko pergi cari bini dulu. Moi: Hahaha! Dah sampai dah Tefal aku ni. Nanti tak payah la susah-susah nak shopping kuali periuk cap Zebra.Tefal ni bro, murah gile RM314 je. Aku kahwin nanti ko bagi hadiah set pisau sudah la. Member: Dah ada calon bini ke? Moi: Weh, camne baju ko takde kedut-kedut aa? Aku dah spray masa iron pun ada kedut sikit ni. Ni la kot orang panggil wrinkle memory, ye tak? Member: Entah, pakai starch kot. Orang rumah aku yang gosok. Bangun-bangun dah siap elok gosok. hehehehehe

This is a video response to the viral video "Asians In The Library". Check, check it out~ ching chong, it means I love YOU! hehehehe

Atau mungkin salah satu bentuk publisiti yang menarik perhatian. Boleh jadi. Ever since I've signed up for this kind of promotions, this is the first time I came across a 96% offer. Why not round it off and make it 100%? XP  Sekarang kena fikir macam-macam strategi bisnes, kena rajin jumpa orang, kena berani ambil risiko walaupun kena kutuk kaw kaw punya lah. hehehehe

No, this time I'm not gonna teach you guys how to speak like a Negeri Niners LOL I can understand a lil bit, but to speak, nope, no confidence. Hmm, but maybe one day I guess. =P After playing football with my lil bro Hafiz, I went back to my room, and checked my email. I was really happy when I saw this - What? A resume request? OHH LA LA~ A resume request. I thought I would never get a resume request from potential employer since I'm a fresh graduate with zero working experience. You can see the title of my resume "Fresh Science Graduate Majoring In Biotechnology". So not appealing. And who would want to view such resume right? So I quickly logged into my account, checked it again if the resume request was really there. It could be a prank for all you know =P It's real, people, it's real. But no, it is real. It is there! I told myself. hahah. So I just approved the request. They just wanna view my resume anyway and I already got a job. It was ju...

Did I tell you guys before that I've been learning Japanese again? Yeah, after totally abandoning my self-taught Japanese lesson 4 years ago, I took the class up again few weeks back. So far so good. What? You ask me how is it possible to learn by yourself? Of course I don't learn just like that. I learn with the help of books, and internet. With internet anything is possible really. Hehe. Well, almost everything. Because there are certain things you can't learn on the internet, and if you still key in those forbidden-yet-not-that-many-people-know-about-it words, chances are your house will be raided by the Feds/CIA/Interpol in an hour or so. Hahaha, I'm not gonna disclose it here. I still wanna live. Anyway, yeah, my Japanese class has been awesome. =P The thing is I'm a Jdorama fan and manga fan (I don't watch anime that much though I love Gintama anime and School Rumble LOL) and learning Japanese has gotten easier because of that. Oh, the girlfriend thought...

After one year that Kanye-Swift incident happened, Kanye West finally apologizes to Taylor Swift, via Twitter. Without further a due, I present you, Kanye West's apology~ oh I should warn you, it is freaking long. I thought if you want apologize you just use the "I'm sorry" words? LOL Man I love Twitter. I've always been at the mercy of the press, but no more... The media tried to demonize me. They wanted y'all to believe I was a monster in real life so you guys wouldn't listen or buy my music anymore. I feel like they were waiting for the opportunity to go in all the way on me, and when it came, they beat me to a pulp. Even now a lot of articles start their first two paragraphs about how much of an asshole I am. I accept the idea (ideal) that perception is reality. When I say perception is reality I mean whatever you think is the truth is your truth. Some people's truth is Kanye is racist—It's not my truth, but I do believe it's my Karma... wa...

Ahh~just woke up. Feeling a lot better but i better get back to sleep. Before that, another quick update, just some funny stories, jokes about doctors dealing with patients LOL. Besides, it suits today's theme. =P Iain speaks frantically into the phone, 'My wife is pregnant, and her contractions are only two minutes apart.' 'Is this her first child?' the doctor queries. 'No, you idiot.' Iain shouts. 'This is her husband.' ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ Patient: It's been one month since my last visit and I still feel miserable. Doctor: Did you follow the instructions on the medicine I gave you? Patient: I sure did - the bottle said 'keep tightly closed.' ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- A mother complained to her doctor about her daughter's strange eating habits. 'All day long she lies in bed and eats ...

Got all these Facebook's screenshots from College Humour . Which sometime you can see even in your circle of friends in Facebook. Sometimes, you get to see this on Facebook..which is kinda sad to look at like this one below - I saw some guys on my fb (before I removed them because I really don't know them but since they wanted to add me and we have few mutual friends, I accepted those requests) who was something like this... Feel sorry to see them keep on updating their status with no comments... hahaha @___@ And some can make you feel awkward.. The unwritten and unspoken rule of Facebook, when it comes to sad status, you either don't comment at all, or you just say, be strong. Did I say you better not comment at all. Another situation where you just don't comment on your friend's status like you know what had happened. You either don't comment, or you ask what's wrong? This is just total creepy.. hehehehe

Hey hey~ the blog has been kind of serious. So, let's chuckle, giggle, smile sheepishly, or just laugh out loud now! =P Though, to my Muslim readers, don't laugh too hard, kurang pahala puasa. Hehehehe. Customer: “I came in here yesterday and ordered a chai tea and you guys gave me a mocha. That was not what I ordered!” Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am. I apologize if somehow they got messed up.” Customer: “Well, I want some sort of gift card or compensation. I am allergic to caffeine. It could have killed me!” Me: “You are allergic to caffeine but you ordered a chai tea? You do realize that chai is a black tea and highly caffeinated, right?” Customer: “I meant chocolate. I am allergic to chocolate!” (I look down at two chocolate bars in her hand.) Me: “Really?” Customer: “Oh f*** you!” (ish ish ish...dah la menipu, mencarut pulak tu. XP) ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- (I’m waiting in line after ordering a cheeseburge...

You know I hate those people who treat waiters or anyone in the service department like trash? But it's a different story if the persons in serving you are being rude to you. Not that I am telling you that it's okay to bash and hurl all those offensive words to them just because they are rude to you. No. As I said before, don't sink too low. Anyway, got a couple of stories shared by those who experienced serving customers, who think they were right when they were absolutely at wrong. =P ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Customer: “I need oil for my car. I need the 10-40.” Me: “I’m sorry, we’re out of that.” Customer: “Well, go get some more.” Me: “I can’t just do that. I could order some for you, and it will be here in a couple of days.” Customer: “No! Just go back there!” *points to the storage room* “Get some from the tap.” Me: “The tap?” Customer: “I know that every gas station is connected to ...

Err, no. I'm not taking part in Nuffnang's blog contest "why vampires suck" because i believe not all vampires on TV suck like the recently new breed of vampires. It's the vampires from Twilight! No offense to those who like it. I'm not attacking you or your personalities, but just the vampires from Twilight. First of all, glittering when exposed to the sunlight? That's not vampire, that's probably some forest fairies. Still remember this quote people - he lives in the wood, he doesn't kill human, and he glitters when he's in the sun ..the dude is absolutely a fairy. from this old post . Glittering in sun I grow up watching vampires being torched once they are outdoor, in the sun damn it. The vampires from Buffy, Angel. Hmmm..only these two series? I think there are others but yeah, I watch these two only so far. Anyway, I'm sleepy and since I'm not a vampire, I should sleep at night. And not breaking into some girl's room. =P So, I...

You guys still remember Mohd Khairuddin's Mom who uploaded 3 videos dedicated to her son and let the whole world watch those? She is also known as Mak YouTube!! Hahaha! Some people say it's for hari raya. But now, we all know what all the videos are about. So, Mohd Khairuddin is using Alliance You:nique Prepaid Card eh? Check out http://mohdkhairuddin.com/ and you will find out that it's all part of Alliance Bank's new prepaid card - You:nique Prepaid Card. Oh, I'm keen to take part in the contest but I can't really remember any Embarrassing Mum story. Hmm. Yeah, Mohd Khairuddin also made a video for his mom too. And I thought it was for hari raya too... =P But the prepaid card sounds good, almost like debit card only that it doesn't use up the money from your bank account, but the money you top up. Do you guys think it's cool or not? hehehehe

It’s All About Point of View By: Ophelia Payne (View Profile) HER DIARY: Tonight I thought he was acting weird. We’d made plans to meet at a bar and have a drink. I was shopping with my friends all day long, and I thought he was upset at the fact that I was a bit late, but he made no comment. Our conversation wasn’t flowing, so I suggested that we go somewhere quiet so we could talk. He agreed but he remained quiet and absent. I asked him what was wrong; he said nothing was wrong. I asked him if it was my fault that he was upset. He said it had nothing to do with me and not to worry. On the way home I told him that I loved him, he simply smiled and kept driving. I can’t explain his behavior. I don’t know why he didn’t say “I love you too.” When we got home I felt as if I had lost him, as if he wanted nothing to do with me anymore. He just sat there and watched TV. He seemed distant and abse...

So, what happened years after that? * cover my eyes * I don't think I can try this with pigs. Maybe with cows and set them loose at Mesra Mall. =P Seems to me the Red Indians ' Immigration Department failed to do just that. Geezz.. Barua KFC

Once upon a time, in a place imagined by someone who wrote this story.... .... There are two nuns. One of them is known as Sister Mathematical (SM) and the other one is known as Sister Logical (SL). It is getting dark and they are walking home, but still far away from the convent. SM: Have you noticed that a man has been following us for he past thirty-eight-and-a-half minutes? I wonder what he wants. SL: It’s logical. He wants to rape us. SM: Oh, no! At this rate he will reach us in 15 minutes at he most. What can we do? SL: The only logical thing to do, of course, is to walk faster. SM: It’s not working. SL: Of course it’s not working. The man did the only logical thing He started to walk faster, too. SM: So, what shall we do? At this rate he will reach us in one minute. SL: The only logical thing we can do is split. You go that way and I’ll go this way. He cannot follow us both. They split and the man decides to follow Sister Logical. Sister Mathematical arrives ...

Hahaha I'm taking a break again from my studying. Check out this dumb and funny court records I came across while stumbling LOL =P You know how they say a lawyer must know how to twist, play with words ? LOL I guess too much twisting gets the better of these lawyers! Lawyer: "Was that the same nose you broke as a child?" Witness: "I only have one, you know." Lawyer: "Now, Mrs. Johnson, how was your first marriage terminated?" Witness: "By death." Lawyer: "And by whose death was it terminated?" Accused, Defending His Own Case: "Did you get a good look at my face when I took your purse?" The defendant was found guilty and sentenced to ten years in jail. Lawyer: "Can you describe what the person who attacked you looked like?" Witness: "No. He was wearing a mask." Lawyer: "What was he wearing under the mask?" Witness: "Er...his face." Lawyer: "What was...

WAHAHAHA!! I laughed when I first see this picture! I don't know whether to laugh at the spelling, or the prices set at that stall. Well, that's pretty mean of me. But it is a good laugh alright. The girlfriend sent me this picture. Before that she asked me, what's the spelling of hotdog in Malay. I said, not that I know of, just write 'hotdog'. Then she sent me the picture. The caption for this picture : "Don't know whose fault, the Malay teacher or the Math teacher?" Maybe it's just another marketing strategy. You know, when people ask, where did you get this? From hokdok stall over there. Brilliant plan on promoting it but fail miserably with the price. How to get profit like this LOL From the way it has been converted to Malay, I reckon the picture at the top was taken in Terengganu. You see, hot=hok. In Terengganu words that end with 't' always sound like 'k'. Example, sesat (lost) = sesak, pekat (thick) = pekak. But pekak (dea...

I'm a fan of American TV series Dexter. Whenever I talk about it, there is always someone who thinks that I'm talking about Dexter's Laboratory. You know, the short scientist kid who always got bullied by his sister, Dee Dee? Came across this funny strip when I was stumbling around the other day. credit to [ funnyjunk ] Imagine kids who are waiting in front of the tele to watch Dexter's Laboratory have to see all those blood splattered, bones, body bag. Not a good childhood I reckon.. hehehehe

No more Thursday's Cool/Funny Pics. Everyday can be cool/funny pics' day =P I seem to forget bout it every time. Bah! I came across this website where you can visualise how the oil spill at the Gulf of Mexico looks like if it was to happen anywhere in this world. So, I start off with where I am now - Morwell. Woo... Tha t bad huh? Even Melbourne city will be affected! Now let's try my hometown in Malaysia, famously known for the oil - Kerteh. The whole town will be gone beneath the oil spill!! GAAHHH!! Scary! My last try, let's go with - Israel..Such a small country but so powerful..dang!! If only it happened for real, I believe the whole administration will be oiled up!! --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Most certainly is true. LOL. Credit to [ Cliff Pickover ] I want one of my doors to be transformed into a ping pong table too! [ fubiz ] Lest we forget =_= [ comics.com ] You think you can tell which one i...